Little Green Faeries

Like someone pissing in your stream of consciousness

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Dialetto Calabrese=Antidote to Sadness?


I have had a long sad week...Terry has been gone (which is generally a good thing) but between the heat and my inability to drive I have had almost no human contact.

It has been me,the puppies,and myspace-which is all very depressing. The dogs have grown bored of me.At first I ran thru the sprinlers and danced with the pups-now they just loo at me like "enough is enough give me a milk bone"

I was feeling all mopey and going to channel my inner Ringwald (as in molly ringwald) and write about my intense feelings of isolation etc...then Enzo called.

He made me laugh, totally cheered me up. He talked about his week at Tropea, about hiding from a chubby ten year old boy from Torino, about Napulitani eating roasted meat and letting their children run naked on the beach-good times. Enzo is probably one of the most quietly witty people I know...(Seymore may have him beat)...he just cracks me up.

He turns 30 this year and I will be in Italy for it. Our birthdays are 10 days apart, and we celebrate them togther when we can. He pointed out that we first spent our birthdays together when I was turning 22,and he 23. He said not much has changed, we are still close, he still puts up with my shit I just don't put out anymore. Poor kid.

He makes me laugh at myself. I wish I could maintain the same kind of intimacy with someone I am sleeping with.

This should be an interesting trip.

Saturday, August 19, 2006

I have been having terrible nightmares.

there have been similar themes...travel,isolation,homelessness,anger,fear of being attacked...oh,and losing my teeth. Last night I dreamt I was lost in what I thought was Italy, but everyone kept calling the neighborhood "east'n" and then I realized I was outside of London. It was late,I had no where to sleep. A man tried to attack me, then my back teeth feel out, and I was just staring at them in my hand.Then I woke up.

part of this comes from actual,tangible fear. I have been alone at the house while Terry is in Colorado-and as many of you know-I had a man break into my bedroom when I was 11-and lately there have been home invasions in Memphis.So my old fears have married a very real,but new one...as much as I like to sleep alone,mama is scared.

Plus,I have anxiety about the future, about returning to Italy and auditioning men for my harem (;,about finding my way...

I don't know. I just wake up tired.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

London
Stratford-on-Avon
Canterbury
Dover
La Havre
Calais
St.Malo
Tour
Loire Valley
Versailles
Paris
Nice
Geneva
Lucern
Figuras
Barcelona
Sevilla
Lisbon
Amsterdamn
Other Dutch Towns
Munich
Freising
Prague
Budapest
Vienna
Milan
Venice
Modena
Padua
Cinque Terre
Pisa
Florence
Siena
Montecatini
Montepulciano
Bologna
Modena
Pienza
Firenze
San Gimingiano
Cortona
Lecce
Roma
Napoli
Paestum
Pompeii
Amalfi
Cilento
Sorrento
La Guardia Piemontese
Taranto
Bari
Crucoli
Rossarno
Albero Bello
Matera
Alta Mura
Potenza
Cosenza
Catanzanaro
Tropea
Taoromina
San Torini
Crete
Athens
Mexico
Guatemala
California
New York
Tennessee
Missouri
Mississippi
Illinois
Washington,DC and State
Virginia
Mass.
Conn.
Ohio
Oregon
Idaho
Colorado
Nevada
ETC,ETC Ad Nauseum...

when will it be enough?

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Back in Memphis.

Terry is in the bathroom as I write this, doing lines and calling his drug dealer.

nothing has changed.

When I was in SF I avoided people who partied-so as to keep my nose clean-I have been here three days and three days it has been since my nose was clean.

I am leaving tomorrow to go stay with my friend Mike-who has a year sober-and If I drink/party I can't stay with him.

Terry makes me sad.

I'll miss my puppies.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Summer Soundtrack:

Neutral Milk Hotel-Oh Comely!

Archie Bronson Outfit-Kink

Federico Aubele-Ante Tus Ojos

Grandaddy-Nebraska

The Replacements-Waitress in The Sky

Robert Wyatt-Sea Song

Jeff Magnum-Gardenhead

White Stripes-Jolene

Yeah Yeah Yeahs-Miles Away

Mott the Hoople-All the Way to Memphis

Set Fire To Flames-Signs Reign Rebuilder (the whole album)

Lucio Battisti-Amarsi un po

Ravel-Onedine

Ik Ben-Cezanne...

Appleyard College-Twice or Our Abandon/On Walden

Fabrizio de Andre-Via Del Campo

Richard Hell and The Voidoids-Love Comes in Spurts

The Cramps-T.V. Set

Pearl Jam- Severed Hand

Mark Isham-Sirend

Peaches-Fuck the Pain Away

Anything by Home

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I really didn't socialize much this summer-kept to myself, loved the city, listened to music, sorted out my head...

My mother and I had a big dinner and mapped out the next 8 months or so..then laughed at lot which is one of. the perks of having a mom who is a psycologist I guess. She agrees I should go to Italy and COMPLETE my TEFL course-which means not fighting with the trainers and getting kicked out of the program 3 days before its completion-build my resume with something that doesn't including flipping bottles or dropping plates.

I am so excited. I will go to Italy, auditon guys for my harem,further my education and eat mozzerella.