Little Green Faeries

Like someone pissing in your stream of consciousness

Friday, July 28, 2006

Dear Mr.Gita,

You never had to promise you would help me out
financially while I was in school.

You seemed so sweet, like you were sincerely open and
loving,and that you truly wanted me to focus on school
and could bear the financial burden-because it would
make both happier in the long run.

Unfortunately that isn't what happened. What happened
was you decided that I was just a leech, and you
weren't going to help me out-you were going to spend
that money as you saw fit.

In the three months I was unemployed before coming out
here I was hit with 4,000 dollars in fees.These were
bills you said you were paying.

So now I have to drop out of school and pay not only
the debt that I earned fair and square-but the debt I
accrued while unknowingly defaulting on my bills.

The hurt,sadness,and anger that I feel is more than I
can put into words.

It really comes down to you choosing drugs and booze
over our relationship. That is where any of your
disposable income was going.

I have sacrificed having any real emotional connection
to anyone for about a year-I have sacrificed any kind
of sexual relationship for just as long. I got so
depressed I couldn't even get out of bed until I came

I wanted to save this relationship.

And the worst part is you have blamed me and I let
you. I took it all in under my skin and felt bad about

I kept thinking if I looked better or made more money
you would treat me right.

I never should have sunk so deep into sadness that I
even thought that way.

I stuck around and got all fucked up and let the
sickness take over.

Not anymore.

I don't know what the solution is,but I would say an
apology is in order. I don't really expect one.

I know what my mistakes are-but just because I may
have been wrong-doesn't make you in the right. So
don't twist this.



Blogger Tiergan said...

Call me if you want to talk or if there's anything I can do.

6:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ilaria ti prego chiamatene fuori, definitivamente. riprenditi i tuoi cani, trovati una casa, fatti aiutare da tua madre magari, finisci l'università e vai via per sempre da memphis.
chiamatene fuori.
abbiamo già mostri , sostenere anche quelli altrui mi sembra un'ingiustizia.
chiamatene fuori.

12:28 AM  

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