daydreams...


Being that my life is more disasterous than usual, I have been trying to nail down what my ideal situation would be...I think I have gotten pretty close to figuring it out.

I would have a job that I was proud of, that made me feel like I was affecting positive change-whether through teaching, social work etc.

My partner would be involved with art or activism in a practical way. They would be a chef, or work for a non profit etc. Or he would have a job that would allow him time for his art, but still get out of bed in the morning.

We would live in California, New York, or in Europe. (Ideally).

There would always be music in the house.

We would have friends and lives outside our relationship that enhanced, not threatened our bond.

We would have happy children that grew up feeling loved by us, and protected by the love they saw that we shared.

I would finally calm down. I would stop being angry or sad for decisions I had made. I would finally see that all of the negativity I had felt or inflicted lead to something, through the process of living and learning.

Now if I can just put my head together right-it may happen someday